Randoms: UPdated as Necessary

Random:
I'm waiting at the crosswalk for the sign to say "WALK". (I hate when fucking people don't follow the sign. Seriously. You're a goddam pedestrian. Keep your idiot ass out the street. People can stop easier than cars. AND, there's someone who will actually say, 'Hey, now is a good time to cross.' Why people insist that the coast is clear and cross, pissing off people in cars, I just don't fucking get it. So, when the sign says 'Don't Walk', just, ya know DONT WALK.)

So, I'm waiting there and it looks like maybe I could get across, but I just don't wanna jam up the works. Well there's this HUGE fat guy behind me. And he starts to cross. Ok. Yeah. I see you, jerk. And he's standing in the middle of the crosswalk, spinning slowly like Mary fuckin Tyler Moore about to toss her hat, and he turns to look at me, dude has an eye patch. A goddam, real-life pirate eye. Probably because a shark ate his eye. So he's all "see!! It's not hard!! Walking!" and that was for me, apparently. And as he's lookin half over his shoulder, taunting me, a s-10 work truck almost clips him. True Story. So. This one's for you Gloating Motherfuckin Pirate Eye. SUCK IT.

THIS JUST IN: Eye Patch guy is a homeless guy. He's part of the Subway crew, (the homeless crazies that wait on the corner by Subway, screaming at people passing by.) One guy, that, looked suspiciously like Flavor Flav came in, while I was in line and asked the fucking Subway 'sandich artist' if he had any spare change. Wait...what the fuck? Can you DO that? lol. Uhm. When the kid said, "yeah....NO." He began heckling him, boo-ing him. Wow. Really?